THOUGHT
Score: 8.5 / 10 
Monkeys, Monkeys! Everywhere Monkeys
If you managed to teach a monkey to talk, you could place one in your letterbox with a letter-opener and a small microphone and when the mail was delivered the monkey could open the letter and read it out loud. The microphone could record it and compress the monkey's chatter into a reasonable sized file that could fit on a floppy disk that could then be rapidly couriered to you (possibly by another monkey!!) and you could then place it in your computer, decompress the file and listen to the letter through your sound card. In this way, I see email eventually becoming obsolete.
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This here item has so far scored 8.5 / 10 on the patented Astonishing Tales Funny-o-meter.
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