Dan Liebke's Astonishing Tales

If I ever have a child, I think I’d really like to name him/her ‘Eight’. When the child was old enough to ask me why I chose that name, I’d tell him/her to, firstly, clarify their gender. Enough of this ‘him/her’ gibberish. Take a stance for once in your life, young Eight! Once he’d sorted [...]

When, oh when, oh when are they going to remake The Sound of Music? I mean, come on, this thing’s over forty years old! Let’s get an up-to-date version already, with, say, Megan Fox reprising the Julie Andrews role and those out-of-date Nazis replaced with more modern enemies, such as Al Qaeda or The Pussycat [...]

We all know that to get into the B-52’s Love Shack, one needs to drive a ‘car as big as a whale’. Because those retro funsters hold no truck with this ‘global warming’ gibberish. But what if you don’t have such a gargantuan, Japan-incitin’ automobile? Where can you get into? Use this handy guide to [...]

Table of Contents

#127 – Of Living And Dying
#128 – New Worlds
#129 – Fantomex
#130 – Weapon Twelve
#131 – Some Angels Falling
#132 – Ambient Magnetic Fields
#133 – Dust

Issue One Hundred And Twenty-Seven – Of Living And Dying
Okay. So the Professor’s back in town. Which can only mean one thing. Endless pontificating. Today’s unlucky recipient: Xorn. There are [...]

Table of Contents

#34 – The Ant And The Avalanche
#35 – The Guilty
#36 – World War Three, Part One
#37 – World War Three, Part Two
#38 – World War Three, Part Three
#39 – World War Three, Part Four
#40 – World War Three, Part Five
#41 – World War Three, Part Six, Mageddon

Issue Thirty-Four – The Ant And The [...]

Table of Contents

#118 – Germ Free Generation, Book One of Three
#119 – Germ Free Generation, Book Two of Three
#120 – Germ Free Generation, Book Three of Three
#121 – Silence
#122 – Imperial
#123 – Testament
#124 – Superdestroyer
#125 – Losers
#126 – All Hell

Issue One Hundred And Eighteen – Germ Free Generation, Book One of Three
Soldiering on into Morrison’s [...]

FINAL TALLY

Character
Points

Dunstan
22

Chipmunk Face
21

Crazy Audrey
20

Ah Joey
14

Dimplestruck Barman
10

Paceman
10

Professor Hold-A-Grudge
6

British Drum Machine
5

Gay Jack
4

Paceman’s Goatee*
4

Counsellor Studmuffin
3

Grams
3

Jack Osbourne
3

British Director
2

Tempestuous Actress
1

Patrick Bateman
1

The All-New Ashton Kutcher
1

*Note: Paceman’s Goatee died in Episode 15 and is hence ineligible to win

EXPLANATION
In the final episode of Dawson’s Creek, one of the characters died. The question was not so much ‘who dies in the last episode?’ as [...]

Starring Clark Kent (Tom Welling) as Superlad, Lex Luthor (Michael Rosenbaum) as Sinead, Chloe Sullivan (Allison Mack) as TIAC, Jonathan Kent (John Schneider) as Bo, Martha Kent (Annette O’Toole) as Boring Old Ma, Lionel Luthor (John Glover) as Porthos, Kara Kent (Laura Vandervoort) as SBH and Lana Lang (Kristin Kreuk) as herself. For more information [...]

Starring Clark Kent (Tom Welling) as Superlad, Lex Luthor (Michael Rosenbaum) as Sinead, Chloe Sullivan (Allison Mack) as TIAC, Jonathan Kent (John Schneider) as Bo, Martha Kent (Annette O’Toole) as Boring Old Ma, Lionel Luthor (John Glover) as Porthos, Kara Kent (Laura Vandervoort) as SBH and Lana Lang (Kristin Kreuk) as herself. For more information on [...]

Starring Clark Kent (Tom Welling) as Superlad, Lex Luthor (Michael Rosenbaum) as Sinead, Chloe Sullivan (Allison Mack) as TIAC, Jonathan Kent (John Schneider) as Bo, Martha Kent (Annette O’Toole) as Boring Old Ma, Lionel Luthor (John Glover) as Porthos, Kara Kent (Laura Vandervoort) as SBH and Lana Lang (Kristin Kreuk) as herself. For more information [...]