Category: movies
List of All Reviews
- 102 Dalmations
- 27 Dresses
- 28 Days Later
- Aeon Flux
- Alfie
- Ali
- Alien vs Predator
- Anchorman
- Anna and the King
- Armageddon
- Avatar
- Back To The Future
- Batman Begins
- Being John Malkovich
- Bewitched
- Breakdown
- Bride Wars
- Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason
- Bruce Almighty
- Cast Away
- Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
- Chocolat
- Con Air
- Dances With Wolves
- Dead Poets Society
- Deep Blue Sea
- Dogma
- Duets
- Face/Off
- Fame
- Fantastic Four
- Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
- Flightplan
- Footloose
- GI Joe
- Grease
- Gremlins
- Hot Tub Time Machine
- I Know What You Did Last Summer
- I Still Know What You Did Last Summer
- Intolerable Cruelty
- Iron Man
- Jersey Girl
- Journey To The Centre Of The Earth
- Jurassic Park 2
- Kill Bill
- King Kong
- Knight And Day
- Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
- Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
- Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
- Lost In Space
- Matrix Reloaded
- Memento
- Minority Report
- Miss Congeniality 2
- Must Love Dogs
- Mystery Men
- Ocean’s Twelve
- Panic Room
- Priscilla: Queen of the Desert
- Raiders of the Lost Ark
- Rocky Balboa
- Rogue
- Secretary
- Shaun of the Dead
- Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace
- Star Wars Episode 3: Revenge Of The Sith
- Star Wars Episode 4: A New Hope
- Star Wars Episode 6: Return Of The Jedi
- Superman 2
- Superman Returns
- Teen Wolf
- The Boogeyman
- The Dark Knight
- The Day After Tomorrow
- The Fifth Element
- The Forgotten
- The Godfather
- The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy
- The Karate Kid
- The Lion King
- The Machinist
- The Perfect Storm
- The River Wild
- The Simpsons Movie
- The Sound of Music
- The Truman Show
- The Usual Suspects
- The Village
- The Wizard of Oz
- Three Kings
- Titanic
- Transformers
- Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
- Twilight
- Twister
- United 93
- Watchmen
Dogma

Watched the 1999 smash hit Kevin Smith film Dogma the other night. Remarkably (or perhaps ‘ironically’, right Jagged Little Pill fanatics?) this movie features Alanis Morissette as the Ultimate Creator. Huh, and people complain about scientists playing God.
[...]
Posted: March 15th, 2010 under movies.
Tags: alanis morissette, ironic twists, kevin smith film
Comments: none
Knight And Day

I know nothing of the upcoming smash hit film Knight And Day featuring uberstars Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz. But I saw the poster at the cinema the other day and questions were well and truly raised:
Is Tom inexplicably wearing a far too short, skin-tight dress?
Or is Cameron equi-inexplicably wielding a wang?
And why is the [...]
Posted: March 10th, 2010 under movies.
Tags: amputee, cameron diaz, preconceptions, smash hit, tom cruise, transvestitism
Comments: none
Alien vs Predator

Recently watched the 2004 smash hit cinematic classic Alien vs Predator. Because, heck. I like Aliens. I like Predators. I like the concept of things ‘versus’ other things. Furthermore, I was unwell and couldn’t be bothered moving from the couch. All these aspects converged to make my viewing of this movie a near statistical certainty [...]
Posted: February 24th, 2010 under movies.
Tags: aliens, predators, statistical certainties
Comments: none
Hot Tub Time Machine
Rumours abound of an impending new movie titled Hot Tub Time Machine. As I say while hijacking the comments at my friend Morgan’s blog, is it too much to hope that the creators of this movie will eschew the obvious idea of a hot tub that doubles as a time machine? (Answer: Yes)
Still, why not [...]
Posted: January 14th, 2010 under movies.
Tags: environmental message, high falutin, ingenuity, large breasts, limits of science, primordial soup, setbacks, snakes on a plane
Comments: 1
Avatar

Huh. So, just a quick update on that list of The Best Movies of 2009 Featuring A Giant Blue Man Being Totally Kickass And Awesome While Dealing With The Threat Of Total Planetary Devastation. Um, yeah. Watchmen is now number two (2).
Posted: December 18th, 2009 under movies.
Tags: blue men, kickassedness, list of best movies
Comments: 1
Star Wars Episode 6: Return Of The Jedi

The most satisfying scene in Star Wars Episode 6: Return of the Jedi is no doubt the one where, after much taunting of Luke by the Emperor about his (Luke’s) inevitable capitulation to the Dark Side and his (Luke’s) destiny as his (The Emperor’s) new apprentice, Vader suddenly summons hidden reserves of strength and hurls [...]
Posted: December 4th, 2009 under movies.
Tags: endless pit, flailing demons, hidden reserves, star wars episode 6 return of the jedi, the emperor
Comments: 2
The Sound of Music

When, oh when, oh when are they going to remake The Sound of Music? I mean, come on, this thing’s over forty years old! Let’s get an up-to-date version already, with, say, Megan Fox reprising the Julie Andrews role and those out-of-date Nazis replaced with more modern enemies, such as Al Qaeda or The Pussycat [...]
Posted: September 13th, 2009 under movies.
Tags: al qaeda, drops of golden sun, gibberish, jamie foxx, julie andrews, lord of the rings, megan fox, nazis, pop culture, pussycat dolls, swine flu
Comments: none
Shaun of the Dead

So I rewatched the awesome Shaun of the Dead last night and was reminded via the special features that the movie was originally marketed as a ‘RomZomCom’. Which is Very Cleverâ„¢.
What would have been more clever would have been if they’d played up the love story between Shaun’s typically British mother and her husband. Then [...]
Posted: August 26th, 2009 under movies.
Tags: australian slang, dead actors, outtakes, special features, zombie movies
Comments: 2
Bride Wars

As agreed by the terms of the hostage negotiation, I sat down and watched Bride Wars the other night. Rarely have I seen a more by-the-numbers rom-com. Minute by minute, as if by screenwriting clockwork, each beat in the inane storyline was slammed down with dire predictability until finally, with soulless inevitability, the foreordained denouement [...]
Posted: August 10th, 2009 under movies.
Tags: denouement, hostage negotiation, inevitability, predictability
Comments: 2
GI Joe

The GI Joe movie is here! And, of course, I’ve been given secret promotional material links to help promote it, because isn’t that what promotional material is all about? The promoting? Hell, yeah.
But you know what kind of promotion I miss? The dance craze tie-in. Remember how, for 1989’s Batman, The Artist Currently Known As [...]
Posted: August 2nd, 2009 under movies.
Tags: bat dance, miley cyrus, nickelback, prince, promotional material, reservoir dogs, toe tapping
Comments: 3