Category: miscellany
The rest of it.
SETI Update
Nope. Nuthin’.
(Keep up to date with the Search for Extra-Terrestrial Intelligence by following setiupdate on Twitter)
Posted: September 21st, 2009 under miscellany.
Tags: seti, twitter
Comments: none
Glasses
Dear Dr Dan,
Is the glass half-empty? Or half-full?
– Optimistic About My Pessimism
Dear Pessimistic About My Optimism,
I don’t think you should look at the glass as being half-full or half-empty. Instead, simply accept the fact that you’re using a glass that is way too big.
[...]
Posted: August 3rd, 2009 under ask dr dan.
Tags: glasses, optimism, pessimism
Comments: 1
Eugenics Are So… Beautiful?

I was talking to Bilbo this morning about the new game that he’s started playing called My Tribe. It’s basically a Civilization™ style of game where you create a little colony and then assign them tasks and they build a world and grow trees and research things and catch fish. All very innocent [...]
Posted: June 2nd, 2009 under gnatterings.
Tags: aryan race, babies, civilization, eugenics, god, hairs, walking to school
Comments: none
I Ache, Therefore I Break
Just listening to Achy Breaky Heart by a certain Billy Ray Cyrus and one question immediately comes to mind. What sort of inner body communications system did he have that you could tell his arms, feet, lips, eyes, mind and fingertips that they were through but his heart wouldn’t find out?
For that matter what kind [...]
Posted: July 21st, 2008 under gnatterings.
Tags: aunt louise, billy ray cyrus, madness
Comments: none
Party
Dear Dr Dan,
If you could invite any three historical figures over for dinner, who would they be?
– Dinner Party Fan
Dear Dinner Party Fan
I’d have to say Porky Pig (our favourite ham!) and Mr Potato Head, both roasted to perfection and topped with a sauce made of freshly pureed Fiona Apple.
Posted: April 15th, 2008 under ask dr dan.
Tags: fiona apple, mr potato head, porky pig
Comments: none
Papa’s Got A Brand New BAG

I’ve just discovered the most exciting bit about the new TV show, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. Namely, the inclusion in the cast of a certain Mr Brian Austin Green (aka David from Beverly Hills, 90210). Finally the good people at Fox have taken note of the countless petitions and threatening letters that I sent [...]
Posted: February 18th, 2008 under gnatterings.
Tags: beverly hills 90210, dance moves, flashbacks, petitions, swooning
Comments: 3
Bored
Dear Dr Dan,
I’m bored. Can you suggest something fun to do?
– Overcome With Tedium
Dear Overcome With Tedium,
As long as you have a dead animal carcass and a stopwatch, you can always have fun. Simply hang the carcass from a backyard hook, pull out your stopwatch and measure how long it takes for the flies to [...]
Posted: November 17th, 2007 under ask dr dan.
Tags: dead animals, stopwatch, tedium
Comments: none
Astonishing African Animals: Hippos

There is one astonishing African animal that kills more humans than any other. What might that animal be, you might ask, if you hadn’t noticed the heading of this article. Is it the king of the beasts, the lion? Or possibly the lithe and solitary leopard? Or do the elephants and rhinos use their respective [...]
Posted: August 27th, 2007 under african animals.
Tags: badges of pride, criminal minds, factories, ghetto slang, nasal cavities, river horses, winnie mandela
Comments: none
Hairy Girlfriend
Dear Dr Dan,
My girlfriend has a lot of hair on her arms and legs. She even gets hairs on her lip sometimes. How can I encourage her to look after herself better? I love her, but I don’t want to date a Yeti!
– Furious About Follicles
Dear Furious About Follicles,
The good news is: you’re not dating [...]
Posted: August 19th, 2007 under ask dr dan.
Tags: bad news, hairs, himalayas, license to wed
Comments: none
I Am Smarter Than You – The Autobiography of Dr Dan

Cost: $AU 22.95, by mail order only
I Am Smarter Than You is the long-awaited autobiography of Dr Dan, the man with the PhD in Everything™. Relive the great man’s life, from his childhood in Kent, where he was smarter than his parents and older brother, to his school days at the Californian Institute For The [...]
Posted: August 12th, 2007 under library.
Tags: badminton, carrot top, deodorant, film screenplays, inspirational handbooks, mischa barton, ryan sidebottom, stephen hawking
Comments: none