Dan Liebke's Astonishing Tales

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Watching NYPD Blue (or some other cop show, who, after all, can tell the difference?) and somebody got himself arrested and was read his rights:

“You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.”

Now, I have no problem with the concept that things you say can be used against you in a court of law.

But will? They will be used against you??

What if you respond to your arrest by saying: ‘I love kittens and puppies and baby ducklings and I wish that there was no sadness in the world…’

How does somebody use this against you in a court of law?

“Your honour, the defendant clearly expressed a love for small animals and it is our contention that he may well have been involved in some form of sexual misconduct with most of his household pets. Furthermore, he quite deliberately reminded the arresting officers of the fact that the world can be a sad place and brought them all down and bummed out their day to the max.”

Or am I once again being too literal-minded?

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